Turnabout Hotsprings
by Phoenix Fidelius
Summary: Its only a misunderstanding!  Or is it?  Phoenix X Edgeworth.  This was a oneshot but I like doing them so much, I'm going to make a little series out of them.  Enjoy!  Chapter 4 is up!
1. Playing With Each Other

Something that sprung out of a conversation I had involving bad smut novels. Heh. Anyway, I am definitely not a NickXEdgeworth 'shipper, but somehow I was spurred to write this little bit of nonesense.

**Phoenix Wright and all associated characters belong to Capcom, not I (though I wish they _were _mine).**

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"Wasn't it nice of Mr. Edgeworth to invite us all to come to this hot spring with him Pearly?" Maya said brightly.

"Yes…maybe you and Mr. Nick can have some…_special_ time…" Pearl cried with delight.

"Pearly, what are you talking about? Hm, I wonder where Nick is anyway? I'll go find him," Maya said.

Pearl turned strawberry pink. "Okay Mystic Maya, I understand, I won't bother the two of you tonight," she tittered, bounding off. Maya shook her head and went to Nick's room. But when she reached the sliding paper door, the sound of voices met her ears.

"Oh yes, Edgeworth, I'm going to do it!" That was Nick…he sounded really weird.

"Wr-Wright, you're drunk, you don't know what you're doing." Hey, that was Mr. Edgeworth. _What the heck? _Maya moved closer to hear them.

"Edgeworth, you and I both knew this was coming…"

"Ah! S-stop!"

"You're looking so vulnerable right now."

"No, Wright, I…"

"Shut up Edgeworth, it will be less painful if you don't resist. Here it comes!"

Maya had heard quite enough. "Nick, what the hell are you…?" she screamed as she ripped the sliding doors open.

"King me, Edgeworth, king me!" roared Nick triumphantly.

"Wright, you bastard! I want a rematch!" Edgeworth snapped back.

"…Checkers," Maya said, with a heavy sigh of relief. "It was…just checkers."

"Oh hey Maya, you wanna play too? Edgeworth sucks!" Nick beamed.

"You just shut your mouth Wright," Edgeworth retorted. Maya smiled at them.

"Sure! I'll go get Pearly and we can all play!" She shot out of the room, leaving the two alone again. Nick and Edgeworth looked at each other.

"Do you think she suspects?" Edgeworth asked warily.

"Edgeworth," Phoenix smirked, placing a none too subtle hand on the other's thigh. "You worry too much."


	2. Good Enough to Eat

xD I can't believe I wrote a sequel to this. Maybe I'll even write a few more...in any case, these are fun to do! xD (NOT a Nick X Edgey fan, but still...)

**Phoenix Wright and Co. only belong to me in my dreams. Sadly, they do actually belong to Capcom.**

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Pearl had thoroughly enjoyed playing checkers with Mystic Maya, Mr. Nick, and Mr. Edgeworth the night before. Of course she had insisted that Mystic Maya sit right next to her "special someone," and had tried to get Mr. Edgeworth to leave a bit early with her so she and Mr. Nick could have some _special _time.

But Mr. Edgeworth just seemed to get more and more annoyed, especially when Pearl had "accidentally" fallen over, knocking Mystic Maya into Mr. Nick's lap. Pearl of course, could not understand why he wouldn't be happy that the two of them were getting so close, so she decided to pay Mr. Edgeworth a visit and ask him about it.

She wandered through the hot spring resort, and it wasn't long before Pearl caught a snatch of Mr. Edgeworth's voice. But as she approached the sliding paper doors, she could hear he was not alone.

"Is it…good, Wright?" came Mr. Edgeworth's voice.

"Oh yeah…Mm." Was that Mr. Nick? Pearl wondered what on earth could possibly make Mr. Nick sound like that.

"I knew you'd succumb to this. Why don't you take some more…?"

"Oh my god…I can't! It's too big…!"

"You are such a lightweight, Wright. Oh well, I'll just have to coax it into you…"

"Aah…mmph. Edgeworth…stop…" Pearl clasped her hands to her mouth at the strange noises. It almost sounded like..._that_. And _that_ was just too much for Pearl.

She crashed threw open the sliding doors, screaming, "Mr. Nick, I'll never forgive…!!!"

"Edgeworth, no more! This cake is delicious but I couldn't possibly eat it all, it's way to big for just me!" Phoenix sighed, turning to their new arrival. "Oh hey Pearls, did you want to try some of the cake Mr. Edgeworth made?"

"Quiet, Wright! Ugh, I knew it was a mistake to let you in on my baking hobby," Edgeworth griped.

"You were eating…cake? Not…anything else?" asked Pearl.

"Of course Pearls, what did you think we were eating?" Phoenix returned.

Pearl blushed and hid it behind her tiny hands. "Oh, nothing, Mr. Nick. I think I'll go get Mystic Maya and we can all have some cake together." She blushed even more furiously. "Maybe you can feed some to Mystic Maya, Mr. Nick."

With that, she hurried off, leaving red scorch marks burning in the air where her cheeks had been. Phoenix smirked at Edgeworth.

"Yeah, and maybe after I feed Maya some cake, I'll take her for a walk in the woods and we can have some _special _time," he teased.

Edgeworth flared up. "You know what Wright if I didn't know better I'd say you actually liked that girl, I mean the way you let her hang all over you last night, I just wanted to…to…" he was tugging fiercely at his cravat.

"Just shut up, Edgeworth," Phoenix cooed. He brushed Edgeworth's tugging hands away, grabbed the cravat himself, and brought Edgeworth toward him, effectively ending his ability to speak.


	3. Pleasure Cruise

So, here's another chapter in this little tribute to misunderstandings. I'll tell you that I really love writing these, they are so fun. And on top of that, I actually think I'm going to take this somewhere. How ambitious of me. xD Well, enjoy anyway.

**Phoenix Wright and associated characters are not my property. **

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Detective Gumshoe didn't go on vacation very often. For one, he really couldn't afford to go anywhere extravagant, and for another, he prided himself on always being ready and willing to help out Prosecutor Edgeworth on a case, and that normally took up nearly all his time. However, with Mr. Edgeworth having gone on vacation himself somewhere, Gumshoe decided he might get some rest and relaxation himself.

Hotels were far too expensive, but Gumshoe made do perfectly well with an old tent and sleeping bag. He went to one of his favorite camping spots, a little lake in the mountains not too far from a famous hot spring resort.

Having spent the day doing a little fishing, Gumshoe decided to take a rest. He had pitched his tent next to a great old oak tree near the shore, and decided that would be the perfect place to relax and enjoy the cool mountain air. He climbed up to a low branch and slung himself over it, back against the trunk. Feeling very contented, he had just begun to succumb to an afternoon siesta, when familiar voices recalled him to wakefulness.

"Come on Edgeworth, whip it out. I want to…play with it," said a voice coyly. Gumshoe wasn't sure why, but the voice reminded him distinctly of a porcupine. And had the porcupine said "Edgeworth?"

"Nn…Ah! Wright! You can't just go groping around in there..." _Whoa, pal._ No mistaking that voice, when Gumshoe had heard it day after day for so long. That was Mr. Edgeworth. And, "Wright"…! _Oh yeah, the spiky haired guy, _thought Gumshoe, after a moment of clanking gears in his brain. But...what were the two of them doing out here? And they sounded…downright strange. Gumshoe crept further along the tree branch trying to catch a glimpse of them, but a large clump of rosebushes blocked his view.

"What? It's nothing I haven't seen before. Ah, there…" came Wright's voice.

"Ah! Be careful…it's sensitive…" returned Mr. Edgeworth.

"Edgeworth, aren't I always…gentle?"

"W-well…" Mr. Edgeworth sounded like he was getting increasingly uncomfortable. What the heck were they doing anyway? It almost sounded like…but it couldn't be.

"Oh, Edgeworth…it's even bigger than I remember. I'm going to enjoy myself for a long time with this. I hope you have the stamina to keep up."

"Nng…wait…"

"No more waiting, I'm putting it in…"

By this time Detective Gumshoe's imagination had gone to some very disturbing places. _Are Mr. Edgeworth and Wright really…!!! _But this thought was cut short. In his growing curiosity, Gumshoe had inched so far along the branch that the rotting old tree could no longer support him. With a thunderous crunch, the bough rent itself from the rest of the tree, crushing Gumshoe's ratty little tent and sending the hapless detective ripping and tumbling through the thorns of the rosebush, until, bruised, scratched, and bewildered, he came to a stop at the feet of Phoenix Wright and Miles Edgeworth.

"Detective Gumshoe?" the two yelped in united surprise.

"What on earth are you doing here, Detective Gumshoe? I told you not to bother me with any cases while I was away," barked Edgeworth.

"What am _I _doing? What are you two doing, pal?!" returned Gumshoe, scrambling to his feet.

"We're playing with these great remote control boats that Edgeworth brought!" said Phoenix brightly. "I remember playing with them when we were kids. I couldn't believe Edgeworth kept them in such good condition all these years. Man these are still fun!" Indeed, even Gumshoe's deficient sleuthing skills could tell him that the two of them were holding remote controls, and that two toy boats bobbed in the waters of the lake.

"I…well…what?" stammered the detective. His plummet had left him quite jumbled.

"Hey Detective, why don't you join us? You can use the boat Larry used to use!" beamed Phoenix. He had the aura of a person who had just rediscovered his childhood.

"Uh…sure pal. Let me just…check on my tent," managed Gumshoe, stumping off to inspect the ruins of his campsite.

When the detective was out of sight, Phoenix turned and eyed Edgeworth. "You don't think he…?"

"Wright, please, think about who you're talking about," barked Edgeworth.

"Yeah, I guess so. Well, once he's out of the way…" Phoenix sidled up just a little bit too close to Edgeworth to be friendly. "We'll have to get back where we left off…"


	4. Animal Instinct

Another chapter of Turnabout Hotsprings. For those of you who were waiting, this chapter will be the first of Franziska's appearances, and I imagine there will be quite a few more, as I hint to in the story. :3 Please enjoy the antics of everyone's favorite whip-wielder.

**Phoenix Wright and Co. are currently locked away for my own personal uses. But they still belong to Capcom.

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Franziska von Karma was entirely unsure what had spurred her go to the hot spring resort. For her part, Franziska despised vacation as a form of showing weakness. Why loaf around doing nothing all day when she could be making herself busy being a perfect prosecutor? However, after a certain scruffy detective had returned from a camping trip with a most interesting story to tell, the whip-wielding woman became most intrigued.

What _were _Mr. Phoenix Wright and her little brother up to anyway?

So under that premise, she now found herself wrapped in a bath towel, soaking in the women's hot spring bath. And though the prosecutor tried very hard not to enjoy herself, she found it increasingly difficult. Just as her face was about to slip into an unwilling smile of contentment, however, voices from the men's side of the bath caught her ear.

"Ahh, finally, a chance for the two of us to – ahem – _relax_ in the hot spring, eh, Edgeworth?"

"Wright, you just better not try anything…_funny_."

Aha. The objects of Franziska's curiosity. Hunting down her quarry had proven easier than she imagined. She waded in the soothing waters until she was very near the tall, bamboo fence that divided the men's bath from the women's and listened closely.

"Well, Edgeworth, look what we have here…?" came Phoenix's voice playfully.

"A-aah! Wright, don't just touch it without thinking!" responded Edgeworth, sounding mildly hesitant. On the other side of the fence, Franziska was puzzled.

_Kinky…?_ was the first thought to run through her mind, somewhat to her surprise.

"Mm…but it's so smooth and…slick…"

"Wr – aah – Wright! Don't you know what kind of dirty…places…that's been?"

"Oh Edgeworth, I think I know…" That was it. Franziska's kinky meter was definitely reading in the red. And her kinky meter was never wrong.

Desiring a mental snapshot of the two biggest pains in her ass (Franziska sniggered at her own pun), she looked for a place where she might peek to the other side. Finding none, she flew out of the women's bath and charged headlong through the door to the men's side, ignoring the protests of a young hotel employee.

Rushing headlong into the men's hot spring, she declaimed, "I've got you now, you foolishly foolish fools!" She tried to stop herself, to clearly visualize the fools' folly, but the slippery stone floor made this impossible, sending the stampeding harpy careening right into the water.

"Franziska…?" Edgeworth said in surprise, turning to a bubbling area of the spring where she had fallen in.

Her head appeared from under the water. Phoenix was chortling.

"Don't you read? The signs say 'No Running!' And what are you even doing here, in the men's bath no less?" the spiky haired man inquired.

"That does not matter! What matters is that I have caught you in the act!" she exclaimed. As she did so, she shot up to her full height in an area of shallow water, revealing herself to be buck naked, her towel having been extricated some time during her mad dash. Edgeworth snorted, choking back a laugh. Phoenix had been reduced to tears.

Franziska looked down upon her exposed figure and was visited by a moment of fury at her blunder, but she quickly recovered, staring them both down in turn and wearing her signature smirk. "What, haven't you fools ever seen a beautiful woman in the nude before?"

"Yes," answered Phoenix. "No," replied Edgeworth simultaneously. The latter eyed the former with just a hint of incredulity.

"Wait a minute," Franziska began, remembering exactly why she was standing there in the buff. "Where is the kinky? I know I detected kinky. What were you two doing just now?"

"_This_ simple-minded buffoon was amusing himself with a disgusting creature he discovered among the rocks in the hot spring," Edgeworth said, indicating Phoenix.

"Jeez Mr. Prissy, it's just a toad," Phoenix answered, pointing to a greenish, wide-mouthed animal sitting on a nearby rock.

"Impossible!" Franziska snarled. "But I heard…I thought…" But by this time several hotel workers had come to "please ask her to not streak around the hotel, and to stay out of the men's baths," and so she was led unwillingly away from the two men.

"My kinky meter is never wrong you foolish fools! I will get to the bottom of this!" she shrieked back at them as she was hauled off. Edgeworth wheeled on Phoenix once she had gone.

"Who was it? What woman have you seen naked?! It was Maya wasn't it, or maybe it was that sister of hers, or…" Edgeworth fumed. Phoenix just smiled.

"Wouldn't you like to know?"

"AHA! So it's true, it's really…" But Edgeworth found himself unable to continue to speak, once Phoenix had started making his…"apologies"…


End file.
